I know Wimbledon has been over for over a week now.
As far as I'm concerned, it's still too soon.
Wimbledon was the worst.
I wish Wimbledon would get trapped under a cement truck and taste its own blood.
I wish Wimbledon would get eaten slowly by a rabid shark and then that shark would get eaten by a whale.
I wish Wimbledon would have to watch Avengers: Infinity War.
But there's always something to be learned in every nightmarish situation. Here's what I learned from Wimbledon:
1) Sometimes tradition is the stupidest thing on earth. The history of Wimbledon is mesmerizing. The traditions of Wimbledon make it special. But Wimbledon apparently hasn't watched tennis in the past ten years and thinks not playing a tie-break in the final set is a good idea. It's the worst idea. It's bad for the fans (when will this end?); it's bad for the other players (when are we going on?); and it's horrible for the players. No one has ever won Wimbledon after playing an elongated fifth set in the early rounds. The tournament is over for anyone who plays a long fifth set. How can anyone keep a rule that ruins the entire tournament for both players? Oh, and by the way, it's boring! Case in point: the Anderson/Isner match might be one of the worst viewing spectacles ever.
Takeaway: It's great to have tradition. Tradition keeps us connected to our storied past. It's also great to know when some traditions have to be eliminated forever for the betterment of the human race.
2) Apres Federer, le deluge. Roger Federer is still one of the two best players in the world but he's also 37. It's not going to last forever. And when the Wimbledon organizers ruined Federer's chances by playing him on Court 1 instead of Centre Court-- and didn't play a tie break for the fifth set-- guess what happened? The value of ticket prices dropped over 60% as soon as Federer lost. We are at the tail end of the Golden Age. Nothing great is coming after Federer.
Takeaway: We need to appreciate what we have right now. Tell a loved one of your love. Contact an old friend who helped your life. Watch Federer clips until 4 in the morning as often as possible.
3) Serena Williams looks to be done winning Majors. The casual fan probably thinks Serena is still a dominant force. She's not. She hasn't been a force for many years now. She wins because she has a great serve and because she intimidates the other women. Her game started dipping mightily a long time ago, but the women's tour has been in turmoil and no one has really wanted the throne. And this mediocrity has allowed Serena to stay involved. Watching the women's final was like watching varsity versus junior varsity. Serena isn't on Kerber's level tennis-wise anymore (or many of the other top players). Unless Serena does this to other women and fear makes them give matches to her, it seems clear her Major-winning days are in peril.
Takeaway: Sometimes we have to let the facts interrupt a good story.
And, so, in parting, I wrote Wimbledon a heartfelt letter:
Dear Wimbledon 2018,
My book is called The Inevitability of Becoming Rich, and you can find that here.